Death By Comparison

Comparison only leads to feeling superior or inferior. Neither serve as a useful purpose.

I was sitting in one of my many college classes. In the back. Just waiting and waiting for class to start. As I’m waiting my mind starts to wonder. My eyes start to wonder. I begin looking at all the people in front of me. Specifically the woman in front of me. I then being the game that I like to call , “death by comparison.” I start judging the woman that surround me. Any physical appearance that I see I analyze it. I One girl that’s sitting directly in front of me. I look at her hair. It’s light brown. Wavy. I think to myself, “she has pretty hair, but mine’s more shiny and less dead at the ends. Then I look over at some of the girls to the left of me. I continually judge them for their body type, their skin complexion, their outfit. And I do this over and over again. Why? Why, do I do this thing I hate so much and that I know is so cruel?

Finding flaws in other people makes you feel better about yourself. It’s just that. I’m finding flaws and building myself up by tearing others down.

And I want it to stop.

I want to change this awful thing I do. I hate it. But how? I processed and thought for a long time and mind you this is something I’ve been wanting to change about myself for years and years. But I finally realized something. To stop I need to first realize my worth. My worth is not in my looks but my worth is defined by my soul. It’s defined by the One who keeps my soul. And my soul is beautiful. Because of who it belongs to. .

“Comparison is an act of violence against one’s self.”

After this first realization, It was still hard. So, I came up with another solution. With any woman I look at I decided I’m going to find one thing I find beautiful about them. I would do this and I would find so much love and joy. It has brought me so much joy and love for the woman around me, for the strangers around me. It made me come upon my second realization; I needed to admire the beauty that surrounded me without tearing myself down. Admire others’ beauty without questioning your own.

This second realization really hit home for me. There is so much beauty in the world. So many beautiful things about the woman that surrounded me that I was missing out on because I was too raped up in myself. Comparison isn’t just the thief of joy, it really is the thief of everything. Instead of comparing I’m going to focus on celebrating others, focusing on the path I’m on, celebrating progress and not perfection, and celebrating others’ beauty.

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