Have you ever seen the movie He Is Just Not That Into You?
Have you ever had that friend that told you a story about how they know someone that had the fairy tale story to make you feel better about your situation? Have you ever compared your “relationship” to someone else’s story to ease your mind? Did a date go bad and your co worker told you a story about how their sisters best friend had the same thing happen but gave the guy a chance again and now they are married and have two kids? Or how a girl went back and forth with a guy for years and after all the heart break they ended up together?
Well if you said yes to any of these, I am here to tell you that…
You are not the exception, you are the rule.
Sorry for the news flash but it was time someone told you. I know it sucks to hear but the bullshit your family and friends are telling you to make you feel better about your situation isn’t going to help you move forward any faster.
So trust me when I say if a guy is treating you like he doesn’t give a shit, he genuinely doesn’t give a shit. No exceptions.
I have been the rule my whole life.
I wish for so long so many people would have just said to me “He is just not into you,” because it would of stung for a moment but a moment is a lot shorter then 6 years of my life. We played the scenarios in our heads that if we do this or that that our story will be like someone else’s; we imagine that if we hold on a little bit longer it will get better; and this has got to stop. If you continue to believe you are the exception you will miss out on many beautiful moments life throws at you.
Stop Comparing Stories
I know your ‘friends cousins brother in law’ made it work in the same situation you are in but if you live your life comparing it to the next person you will never have your own story.
I learned this the hard way. For so long, I held on to the hope that my situation would become the exception and I would have this fairy tale story but all it did was make me stay in a situation longer then I needed.
Once you live your life as though you are part of the rule, it is amazing what you learn about self-respect, walking away, self-love and what you really deserve.
Exhibit A. Chad the drummer who lived in a storage space. He only used me for rides and yet I continued to stalk him for most of 1998. Then oh, um, there was Don, that broke up with me every Friday so that he could have his weekends free. I was delusional about that relationship. I used to refer to him as my husband to random people, like my dental hygienist. Anyway, all my friends used to tell me about how things might work out with these dipsticks because they knew someone, who knew someone, who dated a dipstick just like mine. That girl ended up getting married and living happily ever after. That the exception and we’re not the exception we’re the rule.
Accept It.
This is the last thing you need to do. You need accept that you are the rule not the exception. When you do this, you will realize how much you have put up with over the years. You also will realize that your friends and family were just trying to help, however you need to tell them, you are okay with being the rule and leave it at that.
Take care.
XOXO, Lisa
